Well, it is that time of year again… time to make ourselves crazy with holiday expectations, the urge to keep up with everyone else, and the need to make this year even better than the last.
That said, I am just saying “no” this year – officially. Technically last year and maybe the year before that I said no, but not really. I bought cards – had cute ones made with a fun picture of the kids acting like the little civil people that they aren’t and had every intention of sending them. Then I didn’t. I just ran out of time, got overwhelmed, and they sat there, taunting me.
This year I have decided to not let them taunt me and bluntly state that I am not sending cards this year. I love that you do – do not get me wrong. I just know my limitations and something had to give this year. It is the cards. It has nothing to do with you personally, so don’t think I just skipped you this year. I didn’t. I skipped my parents, too. I skipped Matt’s entire family, as well as my best of friends. Don’t take it as a personal affront. It is not… and here are 5 reasons why:
5. I’m lazy.
There. I am admitting it. I am lazy. L. A. Z. Y. It takes sooooo much time, effort, and planning that this year I honestly don’t have. Getting the kids to cooperate for the picture. Deciding on a witty little saying from our family. Picking the right compilation from the 100’s of places that print cards. Choosing a cool and trendy font. Ordering them. Checking all of the addresses for accuracy. Writing a personal message on each one. Hand addressing them all. Stamps. And then going to the Post Office to mail them. It’s a lot of work for something you are going to open, look at for 10 seconds and then add to a pile that will get tossed in 15 days.
4. I craft, therefor the expectations are ridiculous.
Yes. I am an artist.
Yes. I hand make cards.
No. I will not make my Christmas cards.
The expectation is that as a crafty person I will not just do the above version from #5 and order them, but that I will handcraft each and every card for each and every person on my list. And they will be amazing and beautiful and stupendous. Why? Because as an artist and crafter I should share that gift with others.
Now, let’s take the whole “I’m lazy” part out of this discussion for a minute. Removing that, do you have any idea how long it takes to make a gorgeous and stupendous card for just one person, let alone 75 or more? And, of those 75 people, do you have any idea how many of them will actually appreciate the craftsmanship, time, and effort that goes into making those cars? Maybe 12. One dozen. And in then end, even those 12 won’t keep it and that card, along with all of the others will find it’s way either into the recycling bin, garbage bag, or some container of decorations, never to be seen again.
Add to this the super high expectations to out do the card from the previous year and I need to start next year’s cards now. Oh, it needs to light up with hand-placed LED’s? Great. We can start 2017’s cards now, too.
3. The Letter (aka – How do I spin the story of losing my job into a positive one that doesn’t make me sound like a desperate, lonely, semi-suicidal alcoholic with two kids and husband that lost their cat this year…)
You know the letter I am talking about, right? That generic letter that is sent from two types of people: exhibit A – my life is way better than yours and I am going to tell you all about it and include 20 picture examples, or – exhibit B – my life is way worse than yours so feel sorry for me – now. Oh, and send money if you can.
I refuse to write this letter of updates. That is what facebook, twitter, instagram, this blog, pinterest, the telephone, the family gossip network, Western Union telegrams, and smoke signals are for.
If I am taking the time to send you a Christmas card, we are already friends and/or related. This means you know my life. Or, if not, you know enough other people in my life to know my life via them. AKA – the family gossip network. I am not about to write you a letter telling you that our cat died in the spring, I lost my job, and that the boys are starting to study human development (puberty) in school. Seriously. You either already know or you just don’t care.
I am also not going to write you a letter detailing the super expensive vacation we took to some exotic location the year that happens either. You will already know. You will have seen the pics and blocked me on instagram and facebook. Why pour more salt into that jealousy wound if and when that happens?
2. I haven’t talked to you since, well, years ago…
We aren’t friends anymore. We are distant relatives that never, ever see each other. We only met once.
These are the people that are also on my list. You know who you are… You are there, lurking on the pages of my address book, watching, waiting for me to mail you a letter and a card – a homemade one at that.
I am not sure. Somewhere along the line you were added to the address book given to me at my first bridal shower almost 16 years ago, from which all Christmas cards are sent. If I don’t send it to you this year, but do send it to someone else and they post it on social media, you will know, because we are “friends”. And then maybe you will say something snarky and mean and I look like the biznatch. So, to preemptively deter all of these issues…
No soup for you.
I mean, no card for you. Any of you. All of you. It’s just too much pressure.
Seriously, these are the things that tend to keep me up at night… no wonder I need therapy!
1. I just don’t want to.
Seriously. No excuses, no reasons. I just really don’t want to mess with it. Sorry. I don’t.
Now, out of curiosity, I have to ask… are you sending or not sending cards and/or letters this year and please share with me one reason why you are or aren’t!